Beti Bachao
After fiddling on my Whatsapp, I realised that the battery won't last till I get home. Promptly, I got talking to the lady next to me. She was laden with diamonds and had a very pleasant personality. I noticed the huge rocks on her ears and craved for the Patti bangles she was wearing. Really liked her choice in jewellery.. basic and top notch. She was planning to get her son married. He was 27 years old. She was getting great marriage offers for her son. She started showing me the girls on her iPhone whose proposals had come. They were like today's youth. I kept wondering why these young educated girls want to get married so soon. I even saw their Facebook profiles on her phone.
Most of them made sure all pics were with a group of girls and they looked decent. No pics with guys their age or at a pub or a party. All were daytime pics or at someone's house. Found it a little strange considering they were rich modern girls in their early twenties. The lady was clear, she does not want her daughter-in-law to do any household work. She had started shopping for her...uncut diamond sets and all. The lady was liberal, she said she has a good support system at home and she would be happy if her would be daughter-in-law shows a little warmth and caring towards her.
I was mighty impressed. She was really enthusiastic about her son's wedding and pampering her daughter-in-law. I definitely see that in Gujarati mother-in-laws. This breed knows how to please the young generation. She was actually excited about having another woman in her household. There was no insecurity or territorial dispute visible. She wanted to make her feel welcome and at home in her new surroundings. She was clear that she is not wanting to test her daughter-in-law's abilities to run a house or prepare a meal. The families of the girls sending proposals was already in their league as in the relatives who got them the proposal did their groundwork on checking on the family. She did want from her own Jain community. I happened to be sitting next to her at the waiting lounge. I left filled with questions and some funny hurt.
Why were girls not finding their own spouses?
The son did not have a girlfriend and he was okay with the arrange marriage route.
There was a lot of stress laid on the girls looks. I did not think the son looked like a star.
The kind of girls the son found attractive were the ones who talked and appeared to have Facebook connections. So more hep the girls's pics on Facebook, the son thought they will match mentally.
Mother liked the demure beautiful variety. She knew the Facebook is the deciding criteria for her son.
Or rather she knew how her son's mind works. The son was intelligent self made man. He was doing his own business apart from his father. The why???
Was very happy with the lady's good intention. So many divorces would stop and so many families would live happily, if there was a good Mother-in-law. I mean a good mother-in-law does not only make her family happy but also her daughter's parents and family happy.
Saw on YouTube an ad film on "Beti Bachao" made by a friend. The ad film series felt so real.
A little goodness can go a long way in keeping the Girl Child valued and happy. All this killing of the 'girl child' comes from vicious in-laws and weak sons. The mother-in-laws should take ' Beti Bachao" seriously. Our crime against women will reduce, if these mother-in-laws teach their sons to value women, wives and daughters. It does requires generosity to share the house and things with the daughter-in law. This learning is not for the uneducated and the villagers. This is for the city mother-in laws. This movement has to go top down. Crime against women is getting more gruesome. Meerut and Lucknow episodes are scary. Will having more brothels solve this problem? I am ashamed that such a thought is coming to my mind. Then how can I talk about Beti Bachao or save the girl child? What will stop these men from committing crimes against women? What do we do about this 'Body Politics'? Are we going to be left with questions forever? Or keep treating the daughter-in-law badly? The scriptures do teach us to worship the Devi or the Goddess or the Supreme Energy. Why is violence to women okay? I am glad the Supreme Court said polygamy is not allowed to Muslims in India. But when has that stopped people from having mistresses? The skewed gender ratio, the "forward moving girl child" and the "still backward narrow minded male child"....is this the society we are giving birth to?
Most of them made sure all pics were with a group of girls and they looked decent. No pics with guys their age or at a pub or a party. All were daytime pics or at someone's house. Found it a little strange considering they were rich modern girls in their early twenties. The lady was clear, she does not want her daughter-in-law to do any household work. She had started shopping for her...uncut diamond sets and all. The lady was liberal, she said she has a good support system at home and she would be happy if her would be daughter-in-law shows a little warmth and caring towards her.
I was mighty impressed. She was really enthusiastic about her son's wedding and pampering her daughter-in-law. I definitely see that in Gujarati mother-in-laws. This breed knows how to please the young generation. She was actually excited about having another woman in her household. There was no insecurity or territorial dispute visible. She wanted to make her feel welcome and at home in her new surroundings. She was clear that she is not wanting to test her daughter-in-law's abilities to run a house or prepare a meal. The families of the girls sending proposals was already in their league as in the relatives who got them the proposal did their groundwork on checking on the family. She did want from her own Jain community. I happened to be sitting next to her at the waiting lounge. I left filled with questions and some funny hurt.
Why were girls not finding their own spouses?
The son did not have a girlfriend and he was okay with the arrange marriage route.
There was a lot of stress laid on the girls looks. I did not think the son looked like a star.
The kind of girls the son found attractive were the ones who talked and appeared to have Facebook connections. So more hep the girls's pics on Facebook, the son thought they will match mentally.
Mother liked the demure beautiful variety. She knew the Facebook is the deciding criteria for her son.
Or rather she knew how her son's mind works. The son was intelligent self made man. He was doing his own business apart from his father. The why???
Was very happy with the lady's good intention. So many divorces would stop and so many families would live happily, if there was a good Mother-in-law. I mean a good mother-in-law does not only make her family happy but also her daughter's parents and family happy.
Saw on YouTube an ad film on "Beti Bachao" made by a friend. The ad film series felt so real.
A little goodness can go a long way in keeping the Girl Child valued and happy. All this killing of the 'girl child' comes from vicious in-laws and weak sons. The mother-in-laws should take ' Beti Bachao" seriously. Our crime against women will reduce, if these mother-in-laws teach their sons to value women, wives and daughters. It does requires generosity to share the house and things with the daughter-in law. This learning is not for the uneducated and the villagers. This is for the city mother-in laws. This movement has to go top down. Crime against women is getting more gruesome. Meerut and Lucknow episodes are scary. Will having more brothels solve this problem? I am ashamed that such a thought is coming to my mind. Then how can I talk about Beti Bachao or save the girl child? What will stop these men from committing crimes against women? What do we do about this 'Body Politics'? Are we going to be left with questions forever? Or keep treating the daughter-in-law badly? The scriptures do teach us to worship the Devi or the Goddess or the Supreme Energy. Why is violence to women okay? I am glad the Supreme Court said polygamy is not allowed to Muslims in India. But when has that stopped people from having mistresses? The skewed gender ratio, the "forward moving girl child" and the "still backward narrow minded male child"....is this the society we are giving birth to?
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