Memories in Clothes
In Mahim and Bandra, the schools which teach the tenants of Islam have only Muslim students. They wear a lovely uniform of salwar kameez with two dupattas. One is pinned to the Kurta/ top and the other is used as a head scarf and in a very intricate way. The combination of light blue and sky blue work very well. The children look adorable as little girls. These schools are not co educational.
The Canossa convent uniform is another one I like. A royal blue fitted frock with box pleats. This low waist frock has a white cotton belt. The children have to put white hair band and tie two pig tails with white rubber bands. The blue and white looks so fresh and "student like". The fabric quality is thick and looks ironed even at the end of the day.
Then when I see the college children, I wonder what happens to them. Suddenly the body is unbathed, the jeans are dirty, the fit flops are sloppy and the hair is all shaggy. Is this rebellion mode? Why do teens not want to look smart and neat? Is grunge look the 'in' thing for them? I have a college near our house. I am appalled to see these badly dressed children. Black t-shirts with ghastly messages and the uncombed hair, neon nail polish in the morning! I feel so dirty just by looking at them. The boys put some styling products to make their hair in mohawk style and then forget to shampoo for days. No one wants to wear closed shoes with all the grime around and most have dirty nails. I never wanted to write about badly dressed children as I think dressing is a personal choice but cleanliness is a pre requisite to any grooming. Is this a passing phase with children? How do parents deal with children with dirty habits? Are the parents dirty too? Is there a peer pressure to look dirty or unkept? Was I also like this? I shudder to think that. I had dirty toe nails but was definitely bathed and shampooed. I sound like a pet. To appear wild was an urge for sure. It is not a harmone thing but a confidence issue which one deals with when thrown out of the safe environs of school. I see friend's children missing their school life when they are in college. I loved the freedom and the space the college provided. I was a lost soul with the crowds and the crazy Mumbai fashion. Coming from Jharia, everything the college children wore in Mumbai was scandalising and aspirational too.
I remember a friend from Rajasthan wearing cotton Ghagra Cholis to class. She came from an educated royal family and the stuff was her daily outfit. In Mumbai, cotton ghagra choli is what one wears during Navratri for Garba. The girl was called to the Principal's office and was banned from wearing her traditional outfit. She did not wear any backless or halter cholis or blouses. On the other hand, the black and coloured burqas were allowed and no authority dare question that. We in India have an issue with Indian clothes. Indian cotton clothes are the most practical for our weather but we have done away with the goodness of them. Due to lack of sales, the quality has also gone bad. It is difficult to get a normal decent daily wear lehenga choli in any size. Same for the men's Indian outfits like a Kurta Pajama or a Churidaar or shalwaar, it is impossible to find daily wear. The outfits are now restricted to weddings only. No one dare wear a Paghdi or an Indian head gear. He will be laughed at unless it is for the Baraat/ Indian wedding procession. The head gar was to protect from the sun and to protect the head in case of an accident. Today one is allowed to wear traditional clothes to work, once a year, on the day the Human Resources department of the organisation deems fit. Women wear blazers and Mini skirts to work and wear stockings too. When I see them in the hot Mumbai sun, their condition is pitiable. Wearing Salwar Kameez to work in a MNC is an unsaid 'No' for the young workers. Is it something that we look and feel younger in Western clothes? At times, I do so. But then I wore sarees for nine years when I was working and I did not feel old that time. In Dhanbad, we wore sarees to weddings when we wanted to be seen in the wedding market. Please excuse my crazy language but the arranged marriage scenario was dealt like a "marriage mart". I am sounding so anti-feminist today.
The clothes debate can go on. I have made my mistakes. Smelt bad, worn clothes which I had worn before, not bothered to change nail polish, let my nails chip and have let the eyebrows be thick. I have not returned calls of relatives, not washed my nightwear for four days at a stretch and more of muck. But when I was young, I was dealing with far graver issues in the world. We had to decide which set of friends we wanted to party with, who could you go out for dinner with, what money to save to buy a birthday gift, how long to talk on STD to your parents and yet save money, how to fix your friend with her boyfriend, plan best 'date conversations', sound intelligent without reading newspapers, do well in class, how not to miss the hostel roll call and more. Life was about late night chats about relatives, our view of the wild ones and how not to mess with boys. The palm reading sessions in my room which I conducted with great aplomb and going from room to room asking for food in the night where a Maggi noodles pack could satisfy our mid night cravings. Clothes were borrowed by some friends on a regular basis and on all dates. Some friends managed to take away a lot of my clothes and I dare not ask in case I lost their friendship.
The Canossa convent uniform is another one I like. A royal blue fitted frock with box pleats. This low waist frock has a white cotton belt. The children have to put white hair band and tie two pig tails with white rubber bands. The blue and white looks so fresh and "student like". The fabric quality is thick and looks ironed even at the end of the day.
Then when I see the college children, I wonder what happens to them. Suddenly the body is unbathed, the jeans are dirty, the fit flops are sloppy and the hair is all shaggy. Is this rebellion mode? Why do teens not want to look smart and neat? Is grunge look the 'in' thing for them? I have a college near our house. I am appalled to see these badly dressed children. Black t-shirts with ghastly messages and the uncombed hair, neon nail polish in the morning! I feel so dirty just by looking at them. The boys put some styling products to make their hair in mohawk style and then forget to shampoo for days. No one wants to wear closed shoes with all the grime around and most have dirty nails. I never wanted to write about badly dressed children as I think dressing is a personal choice but cleanliness is a pre requisite to any grooming. Is this a passing phase with children? How do parents deal with children with dirty habits? Are the parents dirty too? Is there a peer pressure to look dirty or unkept? Was I also like this? I shudder to think that. I had dirty toe nails but was definitely bathed and shampooed. I sound like a pet. To appear wild was an urge for sure. It is not a harmone thing but a confidence issue which one deals with when thrown out of the safe environs of school. I see friend's children missing their school life when they are in college. I loved the freedom and the space the college provided. I was a lost soul with the crowds and the crazy Mumbai fashion. Coming from Jharia, everything the college children wore in Mumbai was scandalising and aspirational too.
I remember a friend from Rajasthan wearing cotton Ghagra Cholis to class. She came from an educated royal family and the stuff was her daily outfit. In Mumbai, cotton ghagra choli is what one wears during Navratri for Garba. The girl was called to the Principal's office and was banned from wearing her traditional outfit. She did not wear any backless or halter cholis or blouses. On the other hand, the black and coloured burqas were allowed and no authority dare question that. We in India have an issue with Indian clothes. Indian cotton clothes are the most practical for our weather but we have done away with the goodness of them. Due to lack of sales, the quality has also gone bad. It is difficult to get a normal decent daily wear lehenga choli in any size. Same for the men's Indian outfits like a Kurta Pajama or a Churidaar or shalwaar, it is impossible to find daily wear. The outfits are now restricted to weddings only. No one dare wear a Paghdi or an Indian head gear. He will be laughed at unless it is for the Baraat/ Indian wedding procession. The head gar was to protect from the sun and to protect the head in case of an accident. Today one is allowed to wear traditional clothes to work, once a year, on the day the Human Resources department of the organisation deems fit. Women wear blazers and Mini skirts to work and wear stockings too. When I see them in the hot Mumbai sun, their condition is pitiable. Wearing Salwar Kameez to work in a MNC is an unsaid 'No' for the young workers. Is it something that we look and feel younger in Western clothes? At times, I do so. But then I wore sarees for nine years when I was working and I did not feel old that time. In Dhanbad, we wore sarees to weddings when we wanted to be seen in the wedding market. Please excuse my crazy language but the arranged marriage scenario was dealt like a "marriage mart". I am sounding so anti-feminist today.
The clothes debate can go on. I have made my mistakes. Smelt bad, worn clothes which I had worn before, not bothered to change nail polish, let my nails chip and have let the eyebrows be thick. I have not returned calls of relatives, not washed my nightwear for four days at a stretch and more of muck. But when I was young, I was dealing with far graver issues in the world. We had to decide which set of friends we wanted to party with, who could you go out for dinner with, what money to save to buy a birthday gift, how long to talk on STD to your parents and yet save money, how to fix your friend with her boyfriend, plan best 'date conversations', sound intelligent without reading newspapers, do well in class, how not to miss the hostel roll call and more. Life was about late night chats about relatives, our view of the wild ones and how not to mess with boys. The palm reading sessions in my room which I conducted with great aplomb and going from room to room asking for food in the night where a Maggi noodles pack could satisfy our mid night cravings. Clothes were borrowed by some friends on a regular basis and on all dates. Some friends managed to take away a lot of my clothes and I dare not ask in case I lost their friendship.
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