I started at 18

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Somehow have been wanting to write about all the arranged marriage proposals I saw or rather about the meetings we had with boys. I started seeing guys at the ripe age of eighteen. Whatever that means. I remember an astrologer telling my Grandma that I will be married when I turned 18. So I grew up with that belief too. Got my first proposal at 16 and then the family thought that was a good sign. For sure, I would be married by eighteen. With six children in the same house, my folks wanted the eldest to get married soon, to set the ball rolling for the younger children. I was completely agreeable to this idea. All the women in Jharia Dhanbad got married that way. That was the future and I was fine with it. Like they say, the best laid plans can go awry, we too made a mistake by sending me to Mumbai to study and a hostel to live. I thought I was the same Jharia girl even in Mumbai except for the outward changes of a hair cut and Bambaiya clothes. But it was not so. Slowly and surely, I was transforming and completely unaware of it.
When I had to see the first guy, I was happy, scared , nervous, excited. The boy was found by some relatives. He was living in SObo and worked with his dad, had a lot of money and owned a building. Viola, I had hit the jackpot is what everyone thought. My parents or me had never had these meetings. So we were like country pumpkins. SO new to the 'game'. Actually I didnt even know for long that it was a game.I was dressed in this bright yellow and pink Marwari Kota saree all starched n new. The meeting was at The Sea Lounge at The Taj. Had never been to the Sea Lounge before. We didnt know it had sofa type drawing room seating and not chairs n tables. The boy s family came all sophisticated. I was very sure this guy is the one and it will all work out. We were asked to go to get paan while the adults chatted. SO a short quick drive to Volga paan at fort. I ate one too and came back with red stained lips. SO hilarious. I was nervous and edgy. Trying to give these wise cracks and on hindsight, failing badly. We all loved the boy and it was a done deal from our end.

Well, no calls came from their end. My folks were ready to plan the engagement ceremony. SO they called and the reply was we like the girl, the boy needs time. We bumped into the boy at a couple of weddings but no response. My parents rushed to Gujarat to pray at some religious places. The saints were not very positive. The month long hope was fast dwindling. My parents left Mumbai with a whole lot of advice for me. Stuff like, how I should not go out alone or with girlfriends and definitely not with boyfriends.
The excitement started fizzling out and then it was final exam time.






h boyfriends.

Comments

  1. MallikaNovember 11, 2011 at 1:34 PM

    After a long time Parul...:) Very nice n leaves me wondering where would this boy be now?? just being inqusitive:))
    love
    Malli

    ReplyDelete

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